Value. It’s defined by Merriam Webster’s dictionary “as the regard that something is held to deserve; the importance, worth, or usefulness of something.” A great definition but how does one apply that to oneself? It’s knowing that you are a treasure. It’s knowing what you have to give to others is much more important than anything they can get elsewhere. It’s knowing this. When you know your value, your value doesn’t fluctuate. Some of us see ourselves through the eyes of those who don’t value them. Knowing your worth means regardless of someone else’s “valuation” your value of yourself doesn’t change.
So this goes back to the question of how does how does one do that? Well, some of us have help with this starting from childhood with parents, especially your Dad telling you how special and important you are. As a girl, hearing that from your Father is a huge help. What about those whose Father wasn’t around to tell them that? What about those who did not have a strong Mother figure to demonstrate what knowing your value is all about? This is something that I can speak to because my Father was not around and my Mother was not a great role model for most things.
Outside of my Mother and Father I did have a few people in my life that told me how special I was and treated me as such. However, I did have a hard time with understanding why my own parents didn’t treat me that way but that’s another blog post. What I learned was that I have a great deal to offer. Not only was I good person, I was really good person. One of the exercises that helped me quantify, for myself, my value was listing out all of the things that made me special/great/awesome. From my ability to pick things up with my toes, being able to speak a few languages, to being able to write with my left and right hands. To my surprise….the list was pretty extensive. I added a multiplier of infinity to each one – because why would I cheapen myself within anything less? And viola each line item is infinite and that’s how I came to how invaluable I really am. With this “valuation” I acted and treated myself like I was invaluable. People who treated me poorly were rooted from my life. If a love interest was not interested I did not chase, I simply replaced with someone smart enough to know that I was more than a one in a million girl but a once in a lifetime woman. Knowing your value changes your attitude, behavior and thinking.
It’s a simple but powerful exercise. Try it.
Here’s a hint..no matter what is on your list you are invaluable, special and at the end of the day priceless. I know it but you really need to know it and live it.