“Learn the alchemy true human beings know. The moment you accept what troubles you’ve been given the door will open.” This is a quote I stumbled upon from Rumi. I’m faced with some troubles of my own these days and I keep asking myself how do I use these difficult times to grow? It’s hard. But I am not alone. One of the greatest enigmas of human behavior is the way that we isolate ourselves. We assume that others are not going through “stuff” and try to appear happy.
Well, I haven’t been doing a good job of trying to appear happy. I’ve been melancholy for awhile now but I have to snap out of living my life as a spectator sport. My heart is still heavy and I’m mindlessly walking around just putting one foot in front of the other. Today I asked myself how can I use this difficult time to help me grow? And I think I found the answer.
Chance showed me a love I never experienced before. That of itself was a gift. And I asked myself what would my life have been like without his love? First it’s hard for me to think back when he wasn’t in my life and when I do those times weren’t so great. When I think of the times he was in my life all I do is smile and remember the good times were good and the bad times were not so bad – all because of him. I know for a fact that I’m a better person because I had his love for as long as I had it. His love will always be my greatest. He showered me with an unconditional love, kindness and compassion that I never received from a human being. He showed me what it was like to have my own family. He showed me what love FEELS like. That’s my lesson. Without Chance I would not have known what true love is or how to identify it. He truly opened my heart. I’m living fuller and deeper because I took the chance to love Chance.
Having said all this I still miss him everyday. I miss my friend, my love, my Chancey-pants. But what I learned is that I received the biggest gift the day he waddled into my life 8 years 10 months ago.
He showed me my greatest life lesson. What it means to truly love someone.